So Marvin, my 6-year old nephew, told me that his classmate, Zoey, said to him: “You don’t have talent.” One time, Zoey, threw his pencil away so he can’t use it. She also sat on his face while he was taking a nap. Other times she would call him names. Every time Marvin talks about what Zoey did or said, I would advise him to tell her to stop saying those things and walk away. Just walk away and stay away from her. Everyone knows that standing up to bullies ends the bullying. Eventually.
Marvin’s response is “She doesn’t care!”
“Well, have you told her? I don’t think you’ve told her.” I challenged him.
“She doesn’t care!” he repeated. “Well, I don’t think you’ve told her” I said, and as he leaves my room, he said “I know! I’ll change seats!”
A classic solution for a 6-year old. Or is it?
Sometimes we adults fix our problems like a 6-year old would. “I’ll ignore him.” Or “I’ll let it go this time.” Or “I’ll just pray for her and hope she realizes that what she’s doing is wrong.” I wish it’s just that simple. But it never is, specially when your well-being is affected and the people you love get hurt.
I just finished my 6-month term as president in my BNI chapter. We were faced with many challenges (a.k.a problems) and clearly there was only one path to take. Stick with the fundamentals and let everyone know why we do what we do. Many times, the purpose gets blurred by “good” intentions that are misplaced or disguised as innovation or desire to “improve” things. All I can say is why re-invent the wheel?
Sure, innovations have a place in this world. However, it should be used to heighten one’s purpose not steer away from it.
The past six months was an amazing practice on leadership. The chapter still face challenges, but I’d like to think we have built a strong foundation. No more patches, no more excuses. Just stick with the fundamentals. Well, I did change seats, I’m no longer president. I’m fulfilling a different role in the leadership team and continue to instill the importance of sticking with the fundamentals. It works.
